P O S T E D B Y A L B E R T
I’m a little disappointed that I didn’t receive one of the 23 MacArthur genius awards. I was certain my product line for foundation executives (see below) would catch the attention of the judges.
Oh well, next year, perhaps. My 2011 line will include the Lame Excusalizer (patent pending) which helps foundation execs like me rationalize their salaries even when things aren’t changing much for the better.
| New Products for Foundation Visionaries !!! | |
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The N-Visionator TM Provides hours of practice taking the 30,000-foot view! |
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Executive Visualizer TM Can be configured three ways!
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Perspect-a-Tron TM Solid state electronics powered by your own inflated sense of self-worth! Use the optional Hyper-CubeTM attachment to practice thinking outside the box! |
Mr. Albert is the most lovable foundation exec I have never met. Yeah, he's the only one, too, but still...
Posted by: More Halibut | October 18, 2010 at 12:35 AM
Yes, these all appear to be quite worthwhile... I was wondering, however, whether you might perhaps have something to better enable self-empowerment?
Posted by: Suedown | October 18, 2010 at 08:34 AM
Hakak, yes, I think I might have what you're looking for. Would it be too obvious to call it the Titillater?
Posted by: Albert | October 18, 2010 at 09:51 AM
One night when Mr. Albert's head was exploding from thinking up things for Genius Grants, he stumbled down to a Karaoke Bar, ripped the mic from an elderly lady's hand and broke into a wild rendition of That's What I Want! The audience got all googly and squirmy - they thought he wanted all of THEM. Not!
Posted by: More Halibut | October 18, 2010 at 11:41 AM
Oh, boy, what a night. That was another song somebody sang but it wasn't as good.
Posted by: More Halibut | October 18, 2010 at 11:42 AM