Second-Lifer Issues Fatwa on First-Lifer

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Some moll goes by the handle “Glitteractica_Cookie” put a contract on my good friend Albert’s bona fides, calling him “a voice of the anti-SL backlash” for his post on Second Life, that virtual world everyone’s talking about.

All right, all right, he brought this pile of bricks on himself.  Last time he went virtual, he was run out of the eleventh dimension for claiming a duck with wax lips was more whimsical than a goose in a bonnet. People who share personal reflections on their experiences in Second Life and are “very critical” deserve to get sapped, I say. Suck it up.

But I owe Albert a debt: he once gave my mudder a picture of Valentino in the altogether.  She died last year—very, very happy.  Mama mia!

If you wanna write Albert, he’s laying low.  Last I heard, he was in the Sims’ Virtual Witness Protection Program. 

Smoky Joe, Scruggs, you out there?

Comments

[Tutor]

You can run but you can't hide, Albert.

[erasmus]

Which one is the real virtual Albert?

The one on the right. He can't wear a hat to save his life (head too pointy), so he makes his avatars wear them.

[Paulie Walnuts]

Heh...heh...heh. Pretty funny stuff, big Al. But maybe you didn't pay close enough attention to what happened to my pal Tony Soprano. If you did, you wouldn't be mouthing off like that.

[Cud Bollins]

Let's see. Somebody served (lashed?) Then Albert lashed back (ground stroke?) Then Beth, Creech and Glitter' all took swings (hit pretty hard cuz Albert volleyed back - or was he just close to the net?)

What I want to know is, what is everyone wearing?

Is Albert in that Valentino rig?

Is Glitter' wearing bloomers?

Is this really a Philanthropy blahhhhg??

And who left the U.S. open???

Love-Love (service!)

[Barmy Fungy-Phipps]

Spiffing question, Bud.

Forward slashes, back slashes. Like the dreary small talk at a typesetters' convention, isn't it?

It wasn't lawn tennis at all, as I understand it. It was Whist.

We were at the Drones Club when, suddenly overcome by a fleeting internationalist sentiment, Albert decided to play Whist according to the American rules. He found it a drear experience and expressed his displeasure by composing a few lines of satirical doggerel, whereupon Spoad, who was sitting nearby and who was rather fond of the American point-scoring system -- and who, moreover, had an American cousin living somewhere in Pennsylvania -- took offense, calling Albert a "blackguard" and "the typical blahhger: always dull and usually violent."

So heads up and peckers out. No use spoiling a bit of fun, I say.